🌿 My Thorn, My Teacher: A Holistic Nurse’s Truth About Anxiety

You Can Be Anointed, Educated… and Still Anxious

I’ve always been able to chew what I bite off.

But lately… swallowing it, processing it, digesting it, has been the challenge.

As a holistic nurse, wellness advocate, and educator… this is not something I expected to say out loud.

Because from the outside looking in, I am the one who manages.

The one who leads.

The one who creates systems, builds structure, and brings order to what feels chaotic.

I’ve been known as the one who can take a glass that appears half empty and reframe it, not as half full, but as completely full for what is necessary in that moment.

And yet… even with that gift…

I’ve found myself overwhelmed.

🌱 The Thorn I Didn’t Ask For

Earlier this month, at a conference, I was reminded of a passage in the Bible, where the Apostle Paul speaks about a “thorn in the flesh”, something that remained despite prayer, despite faith, despite purpose.

For me… that thorn has been anxiety.

Not the kind that stops everything.

But the kind that coexists with productivity.

High-functioning.

Multitasking.

Still achieving.

Still showing up.

But internally… feeling like everything I’ve taken on is lodged in my throat.

I can chew it.

I understand it.

I’ve processed it intellectually.

But digesting it… carrying it… holding it all…

That’s where the struggle has lived.

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🧠 When Knowledge Meets Reality

As a nurse, I understand what anxiety is.

I understand neurotransmitters, cortisol levels, sleep deprivation, and the physiological impact of chronic stress on the body.

I understand how the nervous system responds when it has been in a prolonged state of alert.

And as a holistic wellness advocate, I also understand:

• The power of breathwork

• The importance of spiritual alignment

• The impact of environment

• The role of thoughts and emotional processing

I know the practices.

I teach the practices.

I live the practices.

And still… I found myself needing more support.

🌿 The Truth About Support

There is a narrative, especially in holistic spaces, that if you are doing “all the right things,” you shouldn’t need anything else.

But that’s not always truth.

And it’s not always safe.

At one point, I made the informed decision to use medication support; starting with Lexapro and now continuing with Buspar, not as a crutch, but as a tool.

A tool to quiet the noise just enough…

To rest.

To reset.

To regain clarity.

Not to replace my holistic practices,

But to support my nervous system while I continued doing the deeper work.

Because let’s be clear:

Holistic wellness is not about rejecting support.

It’s about understanding what your body, mind, and spirit need… and responding with wisdom.

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✨ Integration Over Perfection

I had to come to terms with this truth:

You can be anointed…

You can be educated…

You can be disciplined…

And still experience anxiety.

That doesn’t make you less powerful.

It makes you human.

And more importantly, it makes you aware.

Because now, I don’t just teach wellness from knowledge.

I teach it from experience.

From the place where faith meets function.

Where prayer meets practice.

Where discernment meets decision-making.

🌸 What I’m Learning in This Season

I’m learning that:

• Rest is not a reward, it’s a requirement

• Boundaries are a form of self-respect, not rejection

• You can’t heal what you won’t slow down enough to feel (Feel the Feels)

• Support comes in many forms, and all of them can be used with intention

And most importantly…

I’m learning that God’s grace is sufficient, even in the presence of the thorn.

Not because the thorn disappears…

But because I am strengthened in how I carry it.

🌿 It’s All Connected

Mental wellness.

Spiritual alignment.

Physical health.

Emotional capacity.

Environmental balance.

It’s all connected.

And sometimes healing looks like prayer.

Sometimes it looks like deep breathing.

Sometimes it looks like stepping away.

And sometimes…

It looks like accepting support in forms we didn’t initially expect.

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💭 A Gentle Reflection

If you are the strong one…

The dependable one…

The one everyone leans on…

When was the last time you allowed yourself to be supported?

✨ Closing

Healing isn’t always about pushing through.

Sometimes it’s about pausing long enough to process what you’ve been carrying.

And maybe… just maybe…

That “thorn” you’ve been fighting…

Is also the very thing teaching you how to care for yourself more deeply than ever before.

— Precious Dear, RN

Holistic Wellness Advocate | Educator | Founder, Precious Holistic Touch

“It’s All Connected.” 🌿✨